


and there's a pain you can't imagine

by aggressivelysketching



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Minor Character Death, asking for a friend, but you can read it as romantic if you want to, i wrote this with a platonic relationship in mind, is it a minor character death if the character died before the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2019-07-07 10:29:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15906447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aggressivelysketching/pseuds/aggressivelysketching
Summary: “Why do you always wear that hat?”Wendy turned her head, gaze settling on Dipper.“I-I mean, that’s gotta be really hot, right? And it’s the middle of summer-”“It was my moms.”





	and there's a pain you can't imagine

**Author's Note:**

> This was done as a request from someone on my tumblr. The person who requested this shared their headcanons and some of the flashback ideas when we were discussing the prompt.
> 
> There’s also a boatload of headcanons in here, since I took creative liberty with Wendys mom.
> 
> Technical things aside, I am, once again, new to writing these characters, so I apologize if I got the characterization wrong!
> 
> -Sketch
> 
> (title is from the song 'After All' from the musical Ever After)

“Why do you always wear that hat?”

Wendy turned her head to the side, her gaze settling on the boy sitting beside her. Under normal circumstances, Dipper Pines always had an air of inquisitiveness, but now he practically oozed curiosity. His head was tilted slightly to the left, eyebrows raised, and he'd focused his wide eyes on the accessory atop her hair.

“I-I mean, that’s gotta be really hot, right? And it’s the middle of summer-”

"It was my moms," the redhead interrupted. She placed a hand on top of her hat, wincing at the heat radiating from the fabric. Dipper had a point-she wouldn't be surprised if it spontaneously combusted after baking in the suns rays for so long. "She always wore it. It still smells a little bit like that cigar she always had with her," Wendy chuckled.

"Oh..." he mumbled, pulling the brim of his cap down so that he didn't have to make eye contact. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

She leaned back, placing her palms on the ground behind her. She closed her eyes as memories of a rambunctious woman, a bright smile, and a green dress flitted through her mind. For a moment, she swore she could smell nicotine and smoke. "It's fine, dude. I haven't told you anything about her."

Even with her eyes closed, it was obvious to Wendy that Dipper was thinking hard. The sound of him fiddling with the hem of his vest was a unique one, unmistakeable, and she bet that if she were looking at him, she'd see him biting his bottom lip in concentration.

"Can you tell me about your mom?" Dipper asked her after a few more moments of silence.

"First of all," she began, "you need to chill, man. Keep messing with your vest, and you'll rip a hole in it before the summer is over." She couldn't help the smug grin that grew on her face when she heard his small exclamation of surprise. It seemed he'd decided to listen to her advice, however, because the rustling of fabric had ceased.

"And second..." Wendy trailed off, considering her answer in the quiet that followed her words. She would have said no to almost anyone else, or just flat out refuse to answer the question. But Dipper had proven many times over that he could be trusted-hell, when she was put next to a perfect copy of herself, he could tell she was the real one. "Yeah, dude. I can tell you about her," she responded.

"She was a lot like dad," Wendy said. "She was, like, really energetic, and she was always up to see a good explosion. That's probably why she was a demolition expert," she chuckled. "She really enjoyed blowing things up, though she'd make sure no one would get hurt before she detonated a bomb. She always prioritized the safety of everyone over having a bit of fun."

 

_(“Mommy, what does de-mo-li-shun mean?”_

_A warm chuckle, followed by a hand ruffling her choppy red hair._

_“It’s my job. I cause explosions to tear down things that we don’t need anymore.”_

_A pause._

_“But isn’t that dangerous?”_

_“It can be, but I always make sure no one will get hurt.”)_

 

“I don’t know when or where she got it, but mom had a cannon, too. She made the mystery behind how she got it a joke after I asked her about it a few times. It was ridiculous and the colors all clashed, but it was one of her favorite things,” she said, shaking her head. “I never understood why. She’d shoot herself out of it and do some stunt or trick for money, and she’d give that money to charity.”

 

_(“What is that?!”_

_“That’s a cannon, sweetie!”_

_A moment of confusion._

_“What are you gonna do with it?”_

_“To put it simply, Wendy, I’m going to use it to fly!”)_

 

Wendy breathed in deeply as she considered her next words, the scent of the damp leaves and the river not too far from where they sat bringing back more memories. "Mom knew the woods like the back of her hand, too. She tried to draw a chart of the forest, once, but she always got too distracted to write down where she'd been. She'd take me exploring, and she'd always let me lead, but even though she didn't have a map she knew exactly where to go to keep me safe. I'd always get confused on where we were, so she'd just help me find the path back home. She knew just how much fun adventuring was for me."

 

_(“Mommy, look! I found a cave! Can we go in, can we, can we?!”_

_“My priority is to keep you safe. Let me go inside and make sure there’s nothing dangerous, first, then you can lead us through it.”_

_A few seconds pass._

_“I think it’s safe! Come on in, sweetie, you need to get to the front and show us how to get out of here!”_  
  
_“I can do it! I’m an expert explorer, just like you!”)_

 

"Once, we found a small lake near the edge of the woods, and mom showed me blast fishing. I'll save you the trouble of trying to figure out what that is," she teased, knowing that Dipper was bound to be curious about it. "It's like fishing, but you don't use a fishing pole. That was too boring for some people, so instead you'd toss a bomb into the water." Wendy couldn't hold back a laugh as she remembered how her mother had forgotten the matches-and almost cursed in front of her. "She lit the bomb with her cigar because she left the matches at home and we had no other way to light a fuse."

 

_(“Where are the matches?”_

_“Aw, sh-I mean-uh, shoot. I must’ve left them at home. I’m sorry, sweetie.”_

_“It’s okay! You can use your fire stick that you always have in your mouth!”_

_“My cigar? I don’t-”_

_Silence for just a moment._

_“Actually… that’d work perfectly! You’re gonna be smarter than me in no time, Wendy!”)_

 

"We only ever did it once," she mused. "The police weren't all too happy with mom after that, for obvious reasons."

Dipper took advantage of the silence, asking a question that she'd guess he'd been thinking over while she was reminiscing. How, uh... how did she die..?"

Instantly, he began to speak again, mortification clear in the way he rushed to continue without even taking a breath. "Never mind, I shouldn't have asked that, I totally just crossed a line. I'm sorry, oh man, just pretend I didn't say anything!" he rambled in a shaky voice. She could hear him gasping, trying to reclaim the air he'd lost speaking so frantically.

"Hey, dude, it's okay," Wendy reassured him. "I was going to tell you anyway." She listened for a few moments, waiting until she heard Dippers breaths return to normal. "It was... an accident. At her job."

 

_(“Dad? What’s wrong?”_

_No answer._

_“Why are you crying?”_

_No answer._

_“Are you okay?”_

_No answer._

_“Where’s mommy? Why isn’t she with you?”_

_A shaky exhale._

_“...Daddy..?”_

_“...she’s not coming home.”)_

 

"The, uh, the smoking. It was really getting to her. She couldn't run as fast as she used to, but she refused to give up her cigar. One of the things she had to do was tear down a row of apartment buildings, but something went wrong. I don't know if anyone ever figured it out." Wendy paused, taking a deep breath. Inhale, exhale. She clenched her fists, and the grass that had been unfortunate enough to be under her palms was pulled up and out of the ground. "Either the TNT was faulty, or someone ordered some dynamite that was stronger than needed, because the explosion was, like, way bigger than it should've been. Mom... couldn't get away in time. They found her, hours later, buried under the rubble. It was too late to do anything for her."

For an agonizing moment, there was only silence, leaving her to her own thoughts. Then, Dipper spoke, his voice so quiet that Wendy could barely hear what he had said.

"Wendy..." he whispered uncertainly, "you're crying."

She lifted her hand off the ground, shifting her weight to her other arm so that she wouldn't fall backwards. She shook off a few blades of grass, and then she gently touched her cheek, freezing when her fingertips touched damp skin.

Oh. She _was_ crying.

"Oh god, Wendy, I'm so sorry," he apologized immediately. "I shouldn't have asked, I probably brought up a whole lot of bad memories."

Wendy finally opened her eyes, blinking rapidly as she once again grew used to the harsh summer sunlight. When she could finally stop squinting, she realized that the blue blob at the edge of her vision was Dipper, and he was visibly panicking. His hands were clasped, resting on his knees, and his arms were shaking. He was deliberately avoiding her gaze, too.

"Dude, she said softly, "it's fine. Really. Besides, I relived many more good memories than bad. I don't blame you, man. I'm not upset or anything." Wendy sat up, crossing her legs, and she turned her body until she was facing him. She brushed her hair back over her shoulder, and then she spread her arms wide, the sudden motion catching Dippers attention. Abandoning his resolve to win a staring contest against the ground, he looked up at her with furrowed eyebrows, clearly not understanding the gesture.

"I think we could both use a hug, dude," she prompted with a slight smirk.

"Oh! Oh, right, yeah, of course," he mumbled, his face flushing red as he realized what she meant. He shuffled closer to the redhead, and Wendy wrapped her arms around the almost-teen, feeling him return the gesture a few moments later. It wasn't the best embrace-Dippers lack of height compared to hers never ceased to surprise her-but it was good enough for the two.

Soon, he pulled away, a tentative smile on his face. "Thanks for telling me all that," he said sincerely, placing a hand on the back of his head. "It, uh, it really means a lot."

Wendy returned the grin,and she adjusted the flaps of her trapper hat, the object that had started the whole conversation. She didn't really mind how hot it was, now. "No problem, man," she responded. "Thanks for listening."

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I'm on tumblr at [spookilysketching!](https://spookilysketching.tumblr.com/)


End file.
